Jay Leno Quotes (40 quotes)

Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced they're getting back together. You know what that means? There's still hope for Ike and Tina Turner.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„You aren't famous until my mother has heard of you.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„The Bush administration said today there is a lot of support for us to attack Iraq. Exxon, Mobil, Texaco, Chevron, they're all lining up.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„The best way to ruin a comedy is to throw a lot of money at it.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Nineteen percent of doctors say that they'd be able to give their patients a lethal injection. But they also went on to say that the patient would have to be really, really behind on payments.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some sex in it.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh... it's as simple as that.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Politics is just show business for ugly people.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Do you know what White House correspondents call actors who pose as reporters? Anchors.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„I was in the ROTC. Of course, ROTC stood for 'Running off to Canada.'“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„More coming out about Saddam Hussein. We now know he takes Viagra and he has as many as six mistresses. No wonder Congress is reluctant to take action against this guy - he's one of their own.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„People don't mind if you have a lot of money if they know you're working for it.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„My stockbroker asked me something important today: paper or plastic?“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„In America, we like everyone to know about the good work we're doing anonymously.“
― Jay Leno ―
Picture of quotation author Jay Leno
„If I have one advantage, it's that I will try to work harder than the next guy.“
― Jay Leno ―

Looking for more quote authors similar to Jay Leno?

Famous comedians:

Jo Brand, Lewis Black, Steven Wright, Ellen DeGeneres, Patton Oswalt, Adam DeVine, Robin Williams, Johnny Vegas, Al Yankovic, Tina Fey

Famous American quote authors:

Taylor Swift, Hillary Clinton, Jennifer Aniston, Noam Chomsky, Dana Goodyear, Bill Gates, Dean Heller, Trent Reznor, Henry Rollins, Alan Alda

Popular American comedians:

Lewis Black, Steven Wright, Ellen DeGeneres, Patton Oswalt, Adam DeVine, Robin Williams, Al Yankovic, Tina Fey, Margaret Cho, Bruce Vilanch

Author information

Jay Leno
Author born: April 28, 1950
Nationality: American
Author Profession: Comedian

Popular topics

More topics

Popular Authors

More authors